WRITTEN BY DR. JIM GRASSI
In or around their forties, frequently men find that their zeal is diminishing or making a radical shift. What our culture calls a “midlife crisis” causes a man to take stock of his accomplishments and where he thinks he’s heading. This reevaluation might be triggered by some event, like the death of a parent or loss of a job, but it can also come on more gradually as a slow realization that he has likely reached at least the halfway point in his life—and life isn’t shaping up to be what he expected. Some men react by trying to regain their youth or making dramatic—often regrettable—life changes. Some buy expensive toys, drop close friendships, devastatingly pursue adulterous relationships, or even leave their families.
Although it may manifest differently, women can experience a midlife crisis as well. As she questions life goals and choices, reassesses relationships, and questions her self-worth, a woman may experience an identity crisis. Feeling dissatisfied, empty, or bored with increased anxiety, depression, and relationship difficulties can lead to unhealthy behaviors, like reckless spending, impulsive life changes, self-neglect, obsessive focus on appearance, lashing out at loved ones, or self-isolation.
Discouragement is a common element of midlife and can serve as very fertile ground for the devil, but a midlife crisis is not in itself a bad thing. In fact, it can lead to the mindset we should have—a reset or correction in direction. Sometimes life’s pressures and anxieties can cause us to gradually lose focus on the things of eternity and become enmeshed with the things of this world. Recognizing that our days are numbered can cause us to refocus our priorities, to reevaluate where our values truly lie, and redirect us to storing up heavenly treasures rather than earthly treasures (Matthew 6:19-20).
The key to weathering midlife is to take care not to focus on temporal things, like wistful reminiscences of the past and anxiety about the gradual disappearance of youthful strength, vigor, and appearance.
“Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer person is decaying, yet our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal” ( 2 Corinthians 4:16-17).
Although Paul is referring to suffering in this passage, the same can be applied to our faithfulness in times of inner turmoil. Making a daily list of what God is actively doing in your life will do wonders to shift your focus away from disappointments and help you see life through a new lens. Yet sometimes the only way to overcome a midlife slump is to “keep on keeping on”—persevere in daily Bible reading and prayer simply because it’s what we are commanded to do. Paul urges us on:
“Let’s not become discouraged in doing good, for in due time we will reap, if we do not become weary” (Galatians 6:9).
As we reset our focus on heavenly treasures and look ahead to the coming of the Lord, midlife zeal can be redirected and reinvigorated.
Scripture Reading: Colossians 3:1-2
Personal Application: Take some time this week to analyze where your zeal lies. For what goal have you been willing to sacrifice? What drives you to excel, and in what areas? How can you increase your zeal for God’s kingdom this coming week?
- Taken in part from Finishing Well, Finishing Strong by Jim Grassi, D. Min.
Jim Grassi, D. Min.
We cherish any verse in Scripture that reminds us to keep focused and intentional about evangelism and discipleship. “But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.” 2 Timothy 4:5